Continuing where Part 1 left off, I had guided my character, Toot Mehorn, into the Shiverpeak mountains.  The journey ahead of me would be a dangerous one, but with the future glory of picking women up in a tank who wouldn't complete this quest?  For five days I traveled across the snow covered lands ( I was locked inside my bathroom for four days and had to survive on that candy looking soap) until I reached the top of a blizzarding mountain.  Fearing the potential hazard of rapidly moving tiny ice crystals, I ran into an ancient mountain city.  That's where I found a group of adventurers, who were on a quest to destroy some sort of +5 ring against ear infections.

After stealing their ring and selling it to gangly little creature, who named it precious, I made it to a dwarven village.  That was when I discovered something that would change my life for ever.  Dwarves are really short.  I spent two days running around their village mocking their size when I finally pulled myself together and got to the problem at hand.  Asking around the village they pointed me towards a weird looking dwarf named Doc.  I quickly explained to him the concept of the modern tank.  Brushing aside all the junk that cluttered his desk, he pulled out a piece of paper and began to draw the blue prints for the tank.  When he finished it, not being a sophisticated engineer like person, I wasn't able to understand them, but I took his word that he knew what he was doing.

With the plan in place we would need the materials to make this baby.  And luckily this little Dwarf knew of a secret material that would make this tank impenetrable.  He pulled me close and whispered in my ear "Snow Ettin toe nail clippings", winked at me, and walked off into the bathroom.  I stood there a moment with thousands of questions in my mind; "why toe nail clippings", "how am I going to get them off an Ettin", and "why did he go into the bathroom after saying that"?  I proceeded to prep my gear: one bow, an invisible unlimited stock of arrows, and my stylish head band.  Ready to move out I began head to a near by cave where Snow Ettins were known to wander aimlessly in.  With a quick journey I arrived to the cave to find a giant population of Snow Ettins.  I was greatly outnumbered and I would need one of my genius plans to claim their toe nail clippings.  And once again I came up with an award winning plan.

After gathering a truck load of toe nails clippings (and a reasonable sum of cash) I returned to Doc who immediately began working on the tank.  He worked day and night while I went around the village with no clothes on begging for gold, until it was finally done.  He dragged my half frozen body off the street and showed me to the spot which held my new tool of destruction.  Or so I thought....

"The Tank" didn't go as planned.  Instead of a killing machine, I had a spiffy Delorean.  But something was better then nothing.  Jumping in the dwarf gave me a stern warning about the use of this machine: "Do not go over 80 mph!" 

Curiously I asked him "Why can't I go over 80 mph?  Will it cause an unexplainable scientific action that will send me into the past?" 

He glared down at me with an odd look and explained "No, but the tail pipe will fall off and you'll stall right in the middle of an intersection".  I started the vehicle up when suddenly the engine burst out of the hood and flew into a near by house.  Turns out Doc wasn't as good as people said he was.  The plan failed.

Swallowing my pride I gracefully ran into the dwarf's bathroom and wept like a little girl.  I decided then and there that I'll be cursed to live only as a caster, never to enjoy the head-bashing joys of life as a fighter.  I re-applied Toot's makeup and left the bathroom.  I left that tiny dwarven village that day never to look back, but I left the last of the toe-nail clippings for their soup-kitchen as a farewell gift.  Returning to Kryta I put on my old gear and prepared to go back to my old life-style.  But the problem with my old life-style is its never normal....

*Special thanks to Funky_C for the "Back to the Future" idea*